Luminary Circle founding member and former chair of the Los Angeles Board of Directors Liz Dennery Sanders offers Step Up members insight each month into key steps to success.
If you’ve been reading my Step Up column for a while, you know I’m not a fan of traditional New Year’s resolutions. Did you scramble on December 31st to make a list of goals you want to accomplish in the coming year, only to abandon them by January 15th – or even sooner?
Our culture seduces you into the idea that with just a little more effort and planning, and a strong dose of willpower, this is the year you’ll stay committed.
But it doesn’t work.
In fact, according to researcher Richard Wiseman, 88% of all those who set resolutions fail.
The problem is, the part of your brain that is in charge of willpower, the prefrontal cortex, operates like a muscle and needs to be trained.
If you decide to train that muscle at the start of the new year with a resolution to learn a new language, workout every day, or lose 20 lbs, that’s the equivalent of a 200 pound barbell you want to lift without any previous training.
It’s no surprise you’re ready to abandon those resolutions after just a few days – your brain just doesn’t want to cooperate.
I think the two big pieces missing from so-called resolutions are: feelings and habit.
If you have a specific goal in mind, ask yourself the following two questions:
1. How will achieving this goal make me feel?
2. What one new habit can I create on a daily or weekly basis that will get me one step closer to this goal?
For me, setting an intention and being connected to how I want to feel helps me create a vision for myself that ultimately pulls me forward.
Best-selling author Danielle’s LaPorte’s Desire Map is a wonderful tool to get in touch with how you want to feel in your life – first – and then design your daily, weekly and monthly actions around your core desired feelings. Once you know what they are, the idea is to create a life that gets you feeling this way as much as possible.
After reading Danielle’s book, I concluded that the way I want to feel this year is creative, inspired and productive.
Once I got really clear about this, I came up with something for myself I’m calling 1:1:1. I chose three actions that I will take every week that will help me feel the way I want to feel and propel me forward both personally and professionally.
In 2014, I’ll be reading one book, trying one new recipe and writing one new blog post or article every week – hence the 1:1:1 theme.
I already love to read and probably consume about 40 books a year, but not only am I upping the ante to 52, I’m also using a better system for recording and organizing my book notes.
I’ve never been a particularly creative cook or spent much time in the kitchen, but this year I’ll try one new recipe each week – often gluten and/or dairy free. Now that I have a nine month old, I need to expand my repertoire.
Lastly, I’m continuing my writing practice, and am committed to one new blog or article each week. I believe that writing is a muscle, and the more you do it, the stronger it becomes.
So there you have it. My intentions for 2014. I’m taking three small actions each week that will ultimately keep me feeling creative, inspired and productive.
How do you want to feel in 2014?
If you were to pick three things that you could do every day or even week, that would help you feel this way, what would they be?
Design your life around THAT.
©Liz Dennery Sanders 2014
Liz Dennery Sanders is a brand and creative strategist, personal development coach and the founder of SheBrand.com, a global online business dedicated to helping women entrepreneurs and the companies that speak to them build smart, engaging brands with style. She is a regular contributor to MariaShriver.com and a member of the Vogue 120, a hand-selected group of 120 influential female decision makers and opinion leaders across the country known for their distinctive taste in style, design and culture. You can connect with Liz at www.shebrand.com and on Twitter: @SheBrandLiz
